糟菜粉干

在诗巫的最后一天，叫了五盘的各式本地炒面。 虽然吃了很饱，但是还是很想叫一碗糟菜粉干。

粉干到了，心中突然涌现这近两年在异乡，诗巫，过的点点滴滴。一幕一幕地在脑海中浮现。

吃着第一口，开胃的粉干让我想起以前尝试吃粉干的感觉。身为游子，真的好不容易但又必须去让自己去适应在这个充满福州文化的地方。这里没有云吞面，也没有白咖啡。虽然之前来过了这儿，但多多少少还是觉得不是属于自己的地方。记得到步时，遇到了很友善的安娣，生活变得好轻松、融洽。有时工作累了，就会有一碗热热家常便饭，好温馨。累了也觉得振奋人心。不时不时就送来一些蔬果，饭菜，好比自己家的儿女般照料。亲善的屋主也在初期的每一个时期一，载我们陪同他家人一起去市场卖些生活用品。每逢大日子，也亲自下厨煮了一大饭桌的饭菜来招待我们。

吃着吃着，酸酸的糟菜让我记起一些心酸的回忆。初来报到，因为交通不便，很多时候，对外来者是十分的不方便。试过在一个辗转难眠的半夜，一通电话就得爬起来，一个人摸黑地走进医院。半夜三点多，漆黑的草丛小经，朦胧的雾伴我同行。这惊悚的经历让我毕生难忘。做夜班走路回家已经是家常便饭。中午徒步遇蛇的恐怖经验也不再是罕见的事。真的，唉！

有试过一个礼拜的晚餐都由糟菜粉干作伴。喜爱那酸酸的味道，也让我渐渐地喜欢了这片土地。慢慢地认识了周围的地方、朋友，熟络了，了解了，就喜爱了。实习工作期间，算是最快活的时候。赶报告、简报的同时，也有出外玩乐的时间。一起唱K，看电影，吃饭，旅行等等都成为了当时记忆里的一部分。在儿科病房期间，虽然开始还不上手，但在老板娘不在的时候，渐渐地学着独立。很多时候工作累了，走进小淘气的房间，玩着玩着也让身心也愉快起来。

写着这片问章的同时，也得进入飞机搭上回吉隆坡的班机。心情实在沉重， 有点不愿意踏上第一步。没落的神情好像六神无主般地乞丐一样。飞机开始起飞，硬着头皮的我，还以为我可以很坚强地强忍眼泪， 但在去机场的一路上，已有点眼泪夺眶的感觉。在黑暗的机厢里，望着窗外的机场和草草木木，一幕幕的画面浮现在脑海，眼泪抵不过这一股涌上心头的感动也夺眶而出。忍得好辛苦的泪水！还有太多值得回忆的事与物无法一一地列出。谢谢那些帮助过我的人，你们会知道要谢谢的就是谁。多多包涵如有做错或说错的话。

A story of 4 mothers - Third Mother

Biliary atresia,

in simple words, it means the bloackage of bile duct, congenital type.

Undergoing HIDA scan a few weeks after born,

the child was sent to operate under Kasai surgery.

This times was his second admission after discharged about one week ago.

Came in with the same problem, ascites (with distended stomach).

Mother looked pale.

The child did not sleep well these few nights.

Innocent yellowish eyeballs of the child showed a severe jaundice,indeed.

We optimised every treatment.

An afternoon while doctors and me are having grand round,

mother cried.

Pathetic. Hopeless.

Specialist explained to mother the condition.

The child had to stay strong in order to survive. It solely depends on his condition.

Mother asked whether should she try traditional medicines.

We all gripped in silence.

For sure, we did not encourage.

Yet, sometimes, it may give placebo effect.

Another way to comfort the mother.

After discussing with other specialists,

a stronger antibiotic was given for one and a half months.

Concurrently, the other medications were continued.

Thanks god,

we saw good result.

The stomach get smaller with normal looking eyeballs.

Eventually the regimen was finished and the child was discharged two weeks ago.

I remembered his big big eyes, exactly like the cat in Puss in Boots.

I witnessed his growth, from lying to sitting without support.

I guided him to learn walking.

Mother made her hard decision to move over here just in case his condition worsens at anytime

where he needs the same regimen again.

I felt empathy when I listened to doctors' discussion that

the recurrence is unavoidable,

he just needs the antibiotic whenever until.......

What the child suffered was much more than what we could actually help.

Sometimes,

as a medical professional,

we are not only focusing on the treatment

but also their development and growth.

We might be able to take care of the child as his or her mother,

but we assists.

To help whenever necessary.

What hope that

the child would never admit to ward again

though I believe there is high tendency.

but we pray.

HB to the child of Second Mother

The story never end.

Just one day after her discharge,

she was readmitted again due to fit.

Unexpected episode.

Yet, mother never panic.

And I knew the next day was her birthday. (the mother kept on reminding me before...haha)

Anyway, I planned to celebrate with her.

It was Friday and we had a long time for lunch.

A good time to search for her birthday cake.

Finally, we got it.

Princess birthday cake!

My two colleagues and me gathered after 5pm.

Bringing the cake and walking towards her room.

We managed to give her a surprise.

She indeed happy.

The moment continued with the singing of birthday song and photo taking session.

The sad side was we could not light up candles for her.

You know that she was on oxygen concentrator.

A room full of O2.

And it was late after the celebration.

we rushed back home for dinner, especially me, thinking what to cook for dinner. hehe...

We brought happiness

We cherished her moments.

A story of 4 mothers - Second Mother

Another noble story...

Frequented to hospital since 2008.

A mother gave up her work and started to concentrate on taking care of this little cute girl.

A girl with an extraordinary disease named: Rapid Obesity with hypothalamic dysfunction, hypoventilation and autonomic dysregulation,

in short, ROHHAD syndrome

I bet you never heard of this as I think she is the only one in this country diagnosed with such disease.

Just a few being diagnosed worldwide and she is one of the unlucky guy.

Sadly,

she cannot breathe as normal people.

She depends on oxygen supply from oxygen concentrator, a bulk machine that her mother has to carry to anywhere she goes, school, hospital, home, just to name a few.

With her permanent tracheotomy for breathing purpose, she frequented to hospital due to minor infection. But it is serious to cause her ill as nobody.

You could not believe that mother was moved to KL

and stayed inside hospital KL for 2years when her child was sent to KL for very first diagnosing and treatment.

A hard time for mother for these past 2 years.

Giving up job and fully taking care of her child.

Mother told me, ' I'm bored to being isolated inside the room. I could not go anywhere.'

but yet I could see form her eyes that she was not blaming for anything.

In a morning after ward round finished, I went to her room checking her medications.

And we started conversation.

Mother shared her stories with me.

Mother spent a lot of money and time, buying the feeding machine and learning everything she needed,

Suction-helping to reduce the phlegm and food particles which may block airway

Feeding-mixing milk, blending juice and putting them into the feeding bag before operating it

Giving medications-administering the right drug and dose, especially during crisis

Operating oxygen concentrator-learning by herself in which doctors do not even know how to switch it on...haha

just to name a few.

Basically, mother learned to be a nurse,

a pharmacist,

a physiotherapist,

a doctor, perhaps

a multitasking mother! Thumbs up!

Mother knows medications well.

She knows her child developed allergy to a few medications.

She knows what to give at the right time.

During the conversation,

I noticed that mother suddenly slapped gently at the child's cheek when the child was lazy to give response to mother.

I was surprised at first.

and I knew how stress the mother was.

She was not intended to hurt the child,

soon she hugged the child tight, saying: Sayang ('Oh Dear' in Malay)

with tears

Without her notice, I leave the room.

Sometimes,

we could not understand their feeling

we might feel empathy

but this is true love between mother and child

Cherish your every moment with your dearest mother.

A story of 4 mothers - First Mother

Life isn't simple

isn't as simple as we encountered

this is perhaps the common thought among us

but what these 4 mothers encountered are really not simple

I hope we learn to appreciate what we have and never demand for more

Mother love, I believe, is the greatest love everyone ever feel.

The story of First Mother:

I believe so far she broke the record for the longest stay in the paediatric ward.

A mother with a 1year-old child diagnosed as tuberculosis since 6 months ago, coming from an isolated place in Sarawak.

It isn't surprised to have patient coming to stay for such a long time as we know that only rivers connect those isolated place hidden inside Sarawak.

And most of them could not present to pharmacy counter to collect medications which expire every fortnight.

For the sake of patient health, specialist would choose to retain patient until the whole regimen is completed. You should know that TB would have high chance of recurrence if patient misses out the medications.

She is a mother to 6-7 children and this child is the youngest, perhaps causing the most headache to her.

Yet I believe, she never blame or complain.

Perhaps she might felt lucky for free stay and food in hospital.

Taking care of patient daily needs would be her everyday work.

And sometimes, the other children would come over to pay a visit to their mother, even though they pretended sick and skipped the school.

The story is getting more interesting when another mother joined in her isolated room.

Another mother with TB children, knowing each other in the hospital and befriended since admission.

This mother would pay occasional visit to her, bringing her some food and accompanying her killing time.

So far, the child looks well with good compliance to medications though he may encountered fast breathing and airway exacerbation aka asthma attack.

Not to forget that the child faces global development delay. Not yet able to sit without support even more than 1 years old.

Pray hard for the child for rapid recovery and always in the pink of health.